Reverence
by Charlie's Channel
Summary: Peter couldn't handle Jason's death, so the night of his death Peter tries to kill himself. Failing in his action, Peter ends up in a rehabilitation hospital still trying to end his life. Slight PeterxOC, not a pairing though!
1. Chapter 1

_Charlie sat down at her computer at 8PM Sunday night and opened a blank Microsoft Word Document. She SHOULD be doing her loads of AP Chemistry and Pre-Calculus homework but being the irresponsible child that she is, she doesn't. An idea for a fanfiction about the musical Bare popped into her head and she started writing. "I'm definitely going to hell for this one." She says._

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The first time it happened Peters mom wasn't informed, nobody knew actually, except Nadia and Mike. The night Jason died in Peter's arms on the stage during their performance he had to be pulled from the cold boys arms by the paramedics and he hadn't calmed down for hours after that. Mike had half-carried Peter back to his room and stayed with him until he thought that the younger boy had fallen asleep for an hour before returning to his own.

Peter, still awake screamed and sobbed into a pillow in his dorm room that Jason and he had shared for hours, unable to control himself after Mike left. Nobody inhabiting the rooms around him decided to say anything even though Peter's hysterics were quite loud. The whole school had been made to watch the play, and everybody knew what happened.

Tears were misted in the eyes of most of the students eyes at St. Cecelia's for Jason, the golden boy of the school, the one who everyone lusted after and some determined to beat. The one that the girls and some boys swooned over when walking down the halls and the same one that could cause somebody to feel inferior based on his angelic personality.

Peter curled up in the bed that him and Jason had shared for four years, the same one that Jason first whispered 'I love you' to the younger boy when he thought that Peter was sleeping. The same bed that Jason had first taken Peter on, and the same bed that Peter was now going to end his life on if the plan went to his liking.

_Nobody had followed Peter when he ran off from the auditorium, they all assumed that he wanted to be alone and that if anyone approached him that they would be shoved away. Peter knew that was what they were all thinking, he could see it in their eyes as he was pulled away from Jason's body. Everyone was in such a state of shock at the events that had occurred that they didn't think to follow the boy that had been affected the most by Jason's death: his boyfriend. _

_After Matt had told the Romeo and Juliet cast about them being together, the whole school knew. No one wanted to think that level-headed Peter would do anything that would jeopardize his life because now the crowd needed Peter to be the person of blame for the death of their golden boy. After the play and before Matt found him, Peter ran from the auditorium and into the courtyard of the school next to the cafeteria. Once he realized where he was, his nosed wrinkled slightly, he was next to the dumpsters and a foul smell was emoting from them. _

_The boy started coughing and he stumbled a little bit towards some benches that were placed on the side of the cafeteria building (1). He hadn't planned to end up collapsed on a bench but as he laid there staring up at a blurry night sky Peter realized that it didn't matter where he was. As long as he wasn't with other people, and as long as he wasn't facing the truth of life, he was fine. _

_He laid there for a while, looking at the stars above him unemotionally, he liked that they were there and would always remain, no matter what drugs they might encounter. The air had a warm feel that embraced Peter's body and comforted his mind, lifting him up from his crumpled form on the bench. As he sat up, Peter noticed that some of the trash bags had fallen onto the ground from an overflow of garbage from the past week. _

_There were dozens of them, all in a crumpled heap (2); some were ripped open from wild animals scavenging for food and garbage spilled out from them and onto the ground. 'That must be what the smell was' Peter thought still observing the foul arrangement of leftovers. The moons shined down onto the ground and over the side of the building that he was on and caused some things to shine from its light. _

_One bag, in particular to Peter stood out, a bright shine emitted from what seemed to be a Kitchen Knife. The knife glowed in a faint mix of white and red, the strange sight for a Catholic High School appealed to him. Peter imagined what it would be like to touch the knife and feel it between his fingers; he imagined what it would be like to run the blade along his bare skin. As he now stood in front of the knife after walking over to it, Peter imagined what it would be like to end the pain he was feeling and take his own life with the knife. Peter smiled, 'maybe it doesn't have to stay in my imagination'._

Now, Peter held the knife in his hands as he lay on his back, he ran the edge of the knife across his bare skin and shivered in the delight of the sensation. Holding his left wrist out, Peter made a small cut, just barely penetrating his skin, and a faint trickle of blood flowed out. As it dribbled out of this flesh, Peter began to make another cut, but go deeper this time.

Again, he smiled and let the hypnotic act take him. An hour later after going slow, Peter was feeling faint from blood loss and he set the knife down next to his bed, his arms were stained red. He looked down at his arms and began crying, "Jason, I just want to die." He whispered before picking up the knife again.

Suddenly, two voices could be heard in the hallway, they got louder as the seconds dragged on, "We shouldn't be doing this." Said a female who sounded familiar, "I just want to make sure he's ok, just wait out here if you want." It was Matt and Nadia, Peter's mind knew the two voices but didn't comprehend what they were saying or what room they were going to, he was too far gone.

Instead, he just held the knife, getting ready to plunge it into his heart, but before he could the door opened and in the frame were two very shocked seniors. "Peter?" Matt said with wide eyes. Peter's eyes met Matt's green ones and he frowned. 'I'll have to die another time.' He thought before being enveloped by Nadia's warm body.

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1) In my school, there are benches EVERYWHERE! Even in the most random places that no one would ever sit

2) Much like Peters heart……..HAHAHAHA! I couldn't help myself! If I had actually put that in this fic than I would have had to delete it, there's such a thing as too much sap and I would have crossed a line. That and saved readers and myself from gagging.

It's not a very long chapter, I plan on having much longer one's for the other chapters. I'm hoping to have each chapter be longer than the previous one. If you are reading this, than please review! If you took the time to read this all the way down to what I'm typing than I would think that you could spare 15 more seconds to share your thoughts, even if there arn't many.

I'm using the Bareindy cast which you can find on youtube if your curious as to what they look like in my head. I'll update this in about a week, so if you like it, please stay with it :)


	2. Chapter 2

This chapter is pretty much just to show you that I'm back and I'm interested in the story again. It's the next chapter in the story and I will be updating as long as people want me to. I hope to be updating more but I promise that i'm not giving it up. This chapter isn't very long and I hope to have longer one's coing up. I fyou have any questions, comments, or concerns please PM me!

-Charlie

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Chapter 2

In upstate New York there is a children's hospital for age's ten through twenty-one. The outside of the building is coral and there are many trees lining a small and vacant parking lot. Flower beds lined the front half of the walls leading to the entrance with a sign that says 'Andrew and Jules Facility' also known as upstate New York's finest children's rehabilitation center.

Most teenagers treated have eating disorders, substance abuse problems, or in one boys case, suicidal tendencies. The newest addition to the facility was in room 101 and had been there for two months after being found by his two friends bleeding from his wrists. '

If Romeo and Juliet got their happy ending, why couldn't Jason and I be aloud?' Peter thought as he lay on his bed, head buried into his pillow. To the right of the boy was a table with his script and a twin that belonged to Jason back when they were doing to the senior play at the end of the play. A cold breeze floated into the room from the bared window and caressed peters body, which made his body react to the temperature change with a shiver, but it went unnoticed to the teen.

He couldn't feel anything anymore; cold, hunger, fatigue, they were all unnecessary to him because he felt dead. He was dead, and the dead don't feel, eat, or sleep. Clear tears were stained on his face and some of them dripped off of him and onto his pillow collecting in a small puddle. Peter didn't sob for his body was exhausted. He couldn't anymore, and after the night of Jason's death the function became extinct from overuse.

In the room that Peter inhabited with one other person the walls were white and the carpet had transformed from a dark brown to a now lackluster tan-grey in the months that he had been in the building. On his side, the walls were also completely bare, lacking of any personality or evidence that someone lived there. A few workbooks that the doctors wanted him to work on sat on a small desk next to a small closet. Unopened letters from his family and friends laid in a stack next to a trash can ready to be used. He could never find it in himself to throw them away though, he just didn't open them.

The only letters that he ever opened were from Ivy Robinson, the girl the Jason got pregnant a few weeks before he died. Ivy sent updates to Peter on how the pregnancy was going and how close she was to her due date. After all, she was carrying the last part of Jason that was on this Earth. Contrary to that side, the other half of the room was covered in posters of rock and punk bands, ticket stubs were taped to them from when Peter could only assume he had bought the posters.

But the most curious thing about the other half of the room wasn't the multitudes of posters decorating the walls, but the boy who had put them up there. Brent Rhodes was Peter's eighteen year old roommate at their new home. He was always trying to get Peter to talk to him when they were together in their room. He was in the facility for anger management issues and depression. Brent had told the other boy that he didn't want to kill himself, but his snooty parents didn't want to take the chance so they shipped him off to one of the best centers in the country.

It was located about four hours from Peter's old school where he had only graduated 2 months ago. Brent only had to be driven a half hour because his family had lived in upstate New York. He was used to luxurious houses and not worrying about money. Brent had never wanted for anything in his life that material or bought with money. The one thing he wanted was to be seen and heard by his parents and friend, but having money took the warmth out of his family and trust from his friends.

Brent was always talking to Peter and the other boy never had to say anything which was comforting to Peter. There wasn't much that Peter didn't know about Brent and that scared the younger boy, He didn't want to get attached to anyone in his final months, Peter didn't want to have anything to override his feelings, it was unlikely to happen anyways, and Jason was his life. Now that he and his life were gone, it wouldn't take long for Peter's body to follow.

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Thanks for reading!


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